Someone asked me today, "How is your day... " I said "Good". She said, "Yes, if we keep saying it maybe it will be so". Interesting thought... Yes, maybe... Good by osmosis! It really has been a wonderful week. Stressful at times and certainly never enough moments for the good stuff - the God stuff, the Family stuff, the Friend stuff.
Tonight, my mind is swirling. So many things I want to write about, talk about, get off my chest about. Where to begin? Breathe.
Let's talk about answered prayers.... Lets talk about your kids teaching you hard life lessons... when you think you are teaching them and then the lesson comes back and smacks you upside the head.
Forgiveness was one such lesson this week... there is a person I let down, someone I just could not make friendship work with, high expectations and several low disappointments. Somewhere along the way the value of our friendship decreased. We made less and less of an effort, until there was no effort to be made.
How does that happen, exactly? Over time... over lots of time. Then one day... no more. My children asked for her, I told them as much truth a six year old can understand, turns out, they understand even the unspoken truth. "Mommy when are you going to get your friendship back"... the only answer I could muster was "Never buddy and sometimes it has to be that way"... Except it doesn't. It really doesn't. Sunday's calling was not to just write, here yes, for sure... but also to her. To her... and tell her it was okay and it wasn't okay.... I prayed over the card. I prayed for an answer, I prayed for it to be received well. I just prayed for a lost friendship that I never expected back. I showed my kids, I let them know I was writing to her.. and in the blue box it went.
Tuesday night... there was a knock at the door. Unexpected.... for sure... hugs, tears, conversation... the beginning of forgiveness... Unconditional love in truest form. A hard life lesson learned!
The necklace I've been wearing almost daily... a gift from this friend a long time ago... A gift three of us friends share... says ~ The story of friendship is written on the pages of the heart... the other side says ~ I'm a better ME because of you.
In sadness I wore it, remembering to be a better friend... A better friend for the friend I let go and the other friend to far away to forget.
I am a better me because I let one down, I am more aware of the value of true love and friendship. I am a better me because when I was down, sometimes the two of them carried me... I am a better me because there is almost nothing I wouldn't do for them...
Forgiveness... Grace... Absolutely humbling.
Love never fails... 1 Corinthians 13:8
In church a few weeks ago our Pastor took a moment and asked all of us to reconcile hurts and wrongs. To rid ourselves of situations we were carrying... if we needed, to go outside, make a tough phone call. A great sermon for sure - impactful, thought provoking... but to do it.... oh, to actually do it! To admit the areas you failed, to look someone in the eye and say I am sorry... what could that do?
I am not saying all is forgotten, I am not saying we can move forward from the exact place we were... But I can say "all is forgiven"... and I can move forward with that!
There is freedom in forgiveness. There is grace in unconditional love...
There is heaven when forgiveness, grace and love collide!
My prayer tonight for you my friends is simply this...
Dear Heavenly Father! Thank you for this wonderful week! Thank you for the days that you made... all 7 of them. Thank you for the beauty all around us.
Thank you for loving us through our toughest lessons. Thank you for showing us your love and grace by sending your Son to die on the cross for us. Thank you for helping us to remember that we are not perfect, that we all make mistakes and that we need to extend the same love, grace and forgiveness that you extended to us ~ even when we were not worthy... you loved us all enough, sent your Son and made us worthy. We are ALL worthy of love, grace and forgiveness.
Thank you Lord for this lesson, thank you Lord for my children who help show me the truth...
Help us work through tomorrow... with love and grace.
In your Sons name I pray ~ Amen.