Oh how I struggled last night. I wanted to blog so bad and I had two topics... friendship and fraud. Stay with me here.
Somehow I couldn't make either of them form in my head or my heart. This morning I woke up thinking again of these two topics, all of a sudden the light-bulb clicked on! I need to marry them; they are alike, born at the same time! Again, stay with me here!
I have the worlds best friends, they come in all shapes and sizes. They live all over the country, some I speak with every day, some I speak with once a year, still others I can go years without speaking to and then when we have a moment to remember each other and pick up the phone the divide of days and years is bridged by memories of the friendship we enjoyed with love and laughter.
On the night of my last blog as I was typing and something happened. Let me take you to that moment.
Somehow I couldn't make either of them form in my head or my heart. This morning I woke up thinking again of these two topics, all of a sudden the light-bulb clicked on! I need to marry them; they are alike, born at the same time! Again, stay with me here!
I have the worlds best friends, they come in all shapes and sizes. They live all over the country, some I speak with every day, some I speak with once a year, still others I can go years without speaking to and then when we have a moment to remember each other and pick up the phone the divide of days and years is bridged by memories of the friendship we enjoyed with love and laughter.
On the night of my last blog as I was typing and something happened. Let me take you to that moment.
Therefore, you shall lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach then to your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. ~ Deuteronomy 11:18-20
I am not one of those people with the miraculous gift of verse memorization. Those people blow me away. When I am in the presence of those people that can call up exact verse, exact location and recite it with confidence I have to pick my jaw off the floor! In awe, I want to be able to do that when I grow up.
Sitting cross-legged on the couch, ready to blog on Wednesday night, heart overflowing with my love for my family, my kids, their unabashed hunger for God's word. These truly being the moments I need to live for... I was typing, words were flowing until the verse.
On the left side, behind my ear I hear like post-it snippets... written down, flipped up and posted on my forehead.
Sitting cross-legged on the couch, ready to blog on Wednesday night, heart overflowing with my love for my family, my kids, their unabashed hunger for God's word. These truly being the moments I need to live for... I was typing, words were flowing until the verse.
On the left side, behind my ear I hear like post-it snippets... written down, flipped up and posted on my forehead.
"we need to talk about Him all the time"
"when we lie down", "when we wake up"
"when we are walking by the way"
"when we lie down", "when we wake up"
"when we are walking by the way"
Oh, my gosh... a verse... but I have no idea where to find it in 863 pages of my bible! To make matters worse this site isn't App friendly on my IPad. . I cannot save to in a draft form which would allow me to search for the verse.
So what happened... I asked my dear husband, the love of my life for help. Gosh, he was so willing to help. He was so willing to grab his phone and search for me. I had to explain how I search to him... I start by going to Google. I type in Bible Verses and then the key words I am looking for, I find what I am looking for and happily insert it into this writing. So when my husband "helps" even after I've explained my strategy, he takes his own approach... He goes and searches and comes up with "no verse found'. "Really? On Google?" "Nope" he tells me... "on our Bible App"... Is that where I told him to start? I explain patiently at least 6 times the easiest route but it just wasn't working... I was patient, until I decided to get off my butt and find it myself... Then the argument happened. It was epic!
I found my verse, finished the blog and fell asleep on the couch --- and he let me stay there...
I am a fraud! I am writing all of you, painting this wonderful picture of a moment with words so that you see this vision of a Norman Rockwell family meanwhile we have just fought this epic battle without love, faith or kindness towards one another. We let the night close on our anger and went to bed separately, like boxers retreating to our separate corners.
A girl friend once told me that you should always make time for your friends. They hold you up when you are down. They show up at your door because they heard something they didn't like in your voice and wanted to just hug you. They are sometimes, a pillar, the rock, strength and determination to help you get-through when you just-can't!
My best friend... my Bestie... my soul-sister-in-Christ! I speak with her daily at least once and sometimes ten times. She is like the warm sun, radiating warmth, love and grace almost all of the time. There should be a picture of her in the dictionary next to the word Joy. When she speaks, even over the phone you can hear and see her smile... We're speaking that next morning, usual conversation until we get to her asking me --- "AND how is your morning Bestie?"
Honestly... not great... I can't even pretend as all the ugliness of the evenings argument are shared because I simply can't bare the weight on my own.
Thursday night a meeting... A group meeting... comprised of some amazing women who embody God's grace, goodness and faithfulness. Matters of business are discussed but more than that the camaraderie as women, as friends, as mothers and wives... Laughing over pasta and tea. Fills the Soul enough to finish the week.
Like flowers I think of my own best friends. I cannot make causal friendships well... if you are my friend you also happen to be my best friend. Each friend.. each flower unique with different soil, veins which run with a different kind of pulse, each one carrying their own kind of special color.
Someone at dinner the other night said... Girlfriends are the gap fillers... like glue holding together my sometimes fragile being... like mortar to the strong sturdy person I trick myself into thinking I am.
True words! Internally wrestling with these two topics last night... I called out to my most trusted advisors on this blogging journey with me.
The challenge... What comes to mind, first thing, few words.... Your girlfriends... And Go!
And as with the post-it notes of verses.... they responded almost immediately...
So what happened... I asked my dear husband, the love of my life for help. Gosh, he was so willing to help. He was so willing to grab his phone and search for me. I had to explain how I search to him... I start by going to Google. I type in Bible Verses and then the key words I am looking for, I find what I am looking for and happily insert it into this writing. So when my husband "helps" even after I've explained my strategy, he takes his own approach... He goes and searches and comes up with "no verse found'. "Really? On Google?" "Nope" he tells me... "on our Bible App"... Is that where I told him to start? I explain patiently at least 6 times the easiest route but it just wasn't working... I was patient, until I decided to get off my butt and find it myself... Then the argument happened. It was epic!
I found my verse, finished the blog and fell asleep on the couch --- and he let me stay there...
I am a fraud! I am writing all of you, painting this wonderful picture of a moment with words so that you see this vision of a Norman Rockwell family meanwhile we have just fought this epic battle without love, faith or kindness towards one another. We let the night close on our anger and went to bed separately, like boxers retreating to our separate corners.
A girl friend once told me that you should always make time for your friends. They hold you up when you are down. They show up at your door because they heard something they didn't like in your voice and wanted to just hug you. They are sometimes, a pillar, the rock, strength and determination to help you get-through when you just-can't!
My best friend... my Bestie... my soul-sister-in-Christ! I speak with her daily at least once and sometimes ten times. She is like the warm sun, radiating warmth, love and grace almost all of the time. There should be a picture of her in the dictionary next to the word Joy. When she speaks, even over the phone you can hear and see her smile... We're speaking that next morning, usual conversation until we get to her asking me --- "AND how is your morning Bestie?"
Honestly... not great... I can't even pretend as all the ugliness of the evenings argument are shared because I simply can't bare the weight on my own.
Thursday night a meeting... A group meeting... comprised of some amazing women who embody God's grace, goodness and faithfulness. Matters of business are discussed but more than that the camaraderie as women, as friends, as mothers and wives... Laughing over pasta and tea. Fills the Soul enough to finish the week.
Like flowers I think of my own best friends. I cannot make causal friendships well... if you are my friend you also happen to be my best friend. Each friend.. each flower unique with different soil, veins which run with a different kind of pulse, each one carrying their own kind of special color.
Someone at dinner the other night said... Girlfriends are the gap fillers... like glue holding together my sometimes fragile being... like mortar to the strong sturdy person I trick myself into thinking I am.
True words! Internally wrestling with these two topics last night... I called out to my most trusted advisors on this blogging journey with me.
The challenge... What comes to mind, first thing, few words.... Your girlfriends... And Go!
And as with the post-it notes of verses.... they responded almost immediately...
Devoted, honest, reliable, loyal, forever, fun, shopping, lunches out, kind ~ Heather
Help keep me together. Build my faith, let me be real & honest....even when real & honest isn't very pretty. ~ Naomi
Fun, trusting, sharing precious moments, belly laughter. ~ Wanda
Straight shooting, encouraging, honest with me, makes me laugh, holds me when I have to cry ~ Holly
Fun, exciting, reliable, laughter ~ Tashie
Laughter. Comrades in faith. Safe haven. ~ Michelle
The people God blessed me with to sweeten, enrich, & enable my life's journey; they know the comfort of silent presence, laughter through tears, and steadfast shoulders to lean on, prayer. They share the responsibility of raising all of our children... Together. And they know that hours of therapy pale in comparison to a long chat with an old friend, a belly laugh on girls night, a shared bottle of wine, or a roadtrip. To the women who sustain me, inspire me, and make me more! ~ Annie
Help keep me together. Build my faith, let me be real & honest....even when real & honest isn't very pretty. ~ Naomi
Fun, trusting, sharing precious moments, belly laughter. ~ Wanda
Straight shooting, encouraging, honest with me, makes me laugh, holds me when I have to cry ~ Holly
Fun, exciting, reliable, laughter ~ Tashie
Laughter. Comrades in faith. Safe haven. ~ Michelle
The people God blessed me with to sweeten, enrich, & enable my life's journey; they know the comfort of silent presence, laughter through tears, and steadfast shoulders to lean on, prayer. They share the responsibility of raising all of our children... Together. And they know that hours of therapy pale in comparison to a long chat with an old friend, a belly laugh on girls night, a shared bottle of wine, or a roadtrip. To the women who sustain me, inspire me, and make me more! ~ Annie
I will close there... I cannot do better than my own best friends! Thankful for each one of you and all the others following along! You all have touched my heart, are too numerous to call out by name and might be embarrassed if I do... but you know who you are. You, like flowers, have engraved your fragrance and color on my heart and have enriched my life like good soil. We are all firmly planted in the ground holding each other up.
P.S. As for my argument with my husband... that deserves it's own special entry. Saving that for tomorrow night. Stay Tuned!
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